I’ll admit, when this week’s Inner Mean Girl (IMG) Challenge called for a week of no gossip, I was a little freaked out. I don’t consider myself a Gossip Queen but I do enjoy the occassional juicy tidbit. Let’s face it, it’s a sad reality that as women, it is in our nature to gossip the cost of it keeping us from the love we want in our lives.
The Universe perfectly timed this challenge because I was planning a get-together with two of my close girlfriends whom I hadn’t seen in a couple of months and we have the tendency to get gabby when the three of us are together. Needless to say, I was nervous about how the conversation would evolve that evening. I decided I would need to take the lead to steer the conversation in a positive direction.
As we made plans for the evening, I knew that our activity would set the tone so instead of heading straight to a bar or restaurant for drinks, I suggested we see Eat, Pray, Love first. Before the evening started, I had also casually mentioned to one of the women that I was giving up gossip for the next week (and hopefully beyond) so that I had an ally during the course of the night. Both of these measures helped to pre-empt any negative conversation that might have snuck up on us and the evening became one of authentic conversation and support among a group of friends.
Luckily, these situations don’t occur very often in my life so it was fairly easy to avoid gossip the rest of my week, but one eye-opening benefit of this challenge was how much more aware of my conversations I have been. In fact, for the past week awareness has been all around me not only in how I interact with others, but also in how I speak to myself. I have literally been able to catch my Inner Mean Girl red-handed and shift my perspective to one of love and acceptance.
Always amazed by the power of a simple mantra, I started everyday with the following:
“Today I speak only from my heart. I leave gossip and toxic words behind. I truly speak only from my heart.”
I also choose to surround myself with supportive friends who nurture my authenticity. I seek healthy connections in my friendships and know when to walk away from relationships that don’t serve me.
What are some ways you avoid gossiping? Have you ever undertaken a friend detox?
Yesterday evening, I listened to a podcast of an interview with author and gender expert, Susan Shapiro Barash. Her advice which I’d like to leave my readers with:
“Be the person you want to become and nurture that person inside your female relationships.”
I challenge you to consider where in your life you are gossiping, how has it been modeled to you and is it what you want to be putting into the world?
I am participating in the Inner Mean Girl 40-day Cleanse as a Self-Love Ambassador. To thank me for my participation, I will receive a self-love gift from the founders of the Inner Mean Girl Reform School.