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My Third Trimester

10/22/19

Second Trimester Update | Health Coach Marissa Vicario

If you missed my previous updates, you can catch up here: 

  • My Second Trimester Gender Reveal: It’s a … 
  • Our Big Island Babymoon 
  • My First Trimester
  • Our Infertility Journey: We’re Having a Baby! 
  • Our Infertility Journey: The IVF Decision
  • Our Struggle with Infertility 

When I started writing this post, I had just started my Third Trimester. Honestly, I never thought I’d be pregnant and definitely not at 40 years old. Children weren’t necessarily part of the plan for us from the beginning. While we hadn’t entirely ruled out starting a family, it was merely something we had discussed over the course of our 10-year relationship but never definitively knew we would do from the start like most couples do. When I was halfway into my 30s, it became crystal clear – I knew I wanted to me a mom.  Once I was finally pregnant, one thing of which I was certain: I would carry my baby to full-term. That ended up not being the case. At 34 weeks and 5 days, I delivered our daughter. (Stay tuned for her birth story in a separate post). From the moment we found out I was pregnant, we’ve wondered about what this baby would be like – who she would look like, what kind of personality she would have and even if she would be a good sleeper. These questions dominated many dinner-time conversations during my pregnancy and as we got closer to my due date, we grew even more excited to meet her. As a bonus, I was looking forward to not being pregnant anymore and David was excited to have someone to drink wine with again! In my Third Trimester – what there was of it -, my physical discomfort was at its worst. I was exhausted most of the time, my acid reflux was at an all time high, I developed pregnancy carpal tunnel which caused my hands and fingers to go numb throughout the day becoming even worse when I slept. Sleep was interrupted almost hourly with a need to use the restroom, an inability to get comfortable and general insomnia. I had persistent back pain, my hands and feet swelled which made it necessary to take my rings off and hard to find any shoes that fit aside from one pair of sneakers.  Even though I was uncomfortable, it was bearable knowing that I was in the homestretch. And it wasn’t all bad. One of the best things about my Third Trimester was that her movements became even more frequent and defined! I loved feeling her stretch and kick.  During this trimester, I also began to feel like time was of the essence. For my entire pregnancy up until Week 28, I felt like I had plenty of time to get everything done, but the day I hit my Third Trimester I was racing the clock. I made a lot of lists and although we checked off a lot of tasks, we never got around to everything before I went into labor (see also: half-packed hospital bag). For example, we still hadn’t finalized her pediatrician, we had big plans to spend a weekend batch cooking, making a delivery room playlist and installing the car seat. None of which happened.  In fits of nesting, I did deep clean our refrigerator and freezer and re-organize our kitchen cabinets. I also squeezed in a final out-of-town trip by train to Baltimore, MD for Expo East, lead my last nutrition workshops and taught a prenatal barre class and workshop.  Not only were we not completely ready to have our baby when we did, having a pre-term baby brings many additional challenges for which we also could never prepare, but one I thing I didn’t expect to experience would be mourning the remainder of the pregnancy I didn’t get to experience. As much as I was looking forward to not being pregnant anymore, I wanted to experience all of it and not being able to do so is something I’m still coming to terms with. Nevertheless and most importantly, we’re grateful she’s healthy and for the extra 5 1/2 weeks we now have to spend as a family of three.  Stay tuned for her birth story coming soon!      ]]>

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Motherhood// Uncategorized

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  1. What It's Like to Have a Baby in the NICU - Where I Need to Be says:
    November 20, 2019 at 6:04 am

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About Me


Welcome! My name is Marissa and I’m a lover of all things health and wellness.As a NYC-based board-Certified Wellness Coach and Healthy Living Expert, I share my own health secrets, get-fit tips and the cooking expertise that has inspired countless women to change their relationship with food and turbocharge their health to become holistically hot in a way that’s fun and fearless.
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It all comes down to your mindset ... I gained 4 It all comes down to your mindset ... 

I gained 45 pounds during my pregnancy and after I had my daughter I wasn't physically or psychologically ready to lose any weight that hadn't come off naturally -- for a FULL year. 

And that's ok. 

But once I made the decision and felt ready physically and emotionally to embrace weight loss, here's what happened in my head. 

Thoughts that I had no business being a mom and wanting to lose weight. Thoughts that as a mom, my body should look one way and not another. When my muscle definition started to come back or I saw myself lifting heavy in the mirror, that little voice would tell me I shouldn't care about being fit like I was before I had a baby - that version of me that also makes me  feel happy and complete. 

I could have let those thoughts take over and lead to self sabotage. 

Instead, I let them come then pushed them away and learned to be comfortable with the version of me that was both fit AND a Mom. Because the more I accept the part of myself that is fit and healthy and lean and strong, the better I show up as the part of me that is also a Mom. 

I can be both and so can you. 

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